Archive for October 18th, 2009

Mr. Bingley v. Mr. Darcy

October 18, 2009

Lately I’ve found myself musing on two of the relationships presented in P&P. I can’t get into Mr.& Mrs. Bennett’s sitch because that would take numerous chapters and several marriage  counselors to sort out, and I simply don’t have the time. But, let’s take a look at the two relationship choices Ms. Jane Austen presents to us in the forms of Jane and Charles and Lizzy and Fitzwilliam.

But before we get into the nitty-gritty, I will simply rewrite the greatest  first line ever.

” It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.”

Professor Doig would flip for the G-string lede, right? Although, it does not give us any W’s or How, so maybe not. Anyway, I digress. Back to the point.

And the point is this, will you be or are you a Jane Bennett, going the way of Mr. Bingley, the so called “ideal” where everything is perfectly copacetic? Or will you be (are you) an Elizabeth Bennett who will find love at the end of a long and hard “battle of the souls”  between yourself and your Mr. Darcy?

And you might wonder why this post is finding its way onto my “fashion” blog?  I myself did wonder the very same, and my justification is almost valid! It’s about style, maybe not clothing, but  “personality style” and “relationship style”. Now, usually with our fashions we have choice (hopefully nobody reading this is still being dressed by their mamas) and I would argue that our relationships are partially by choice, somewhat within our control,but I would also say that people just happen to us, and are therefore beyond our choice. And maybe that is what’s so interesting about Lizzy and Mr.D, Lizzy would NEVER have chosen Mr. Darcy, but he happened to her nonetheless. So what I’m getting at is this, we have some choice in who we are (the style of lady) and we have little choice, if any, in who we end up being with. I think this might be half-baked, but I will proceed anyway.

So, let’s look at Jane and Mr. Bingley. So nice, so easy. Some might say, the perfect love. And I think this is what most people view as the most desirable of relationships.

But, I am here to argue for the other, the darker, more complex courtship of Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. I mean, there’s a reason why they are the central figures in the book. Jane Austen was no dummy, she knew the power and hottness of the ” I despise you, but I’m super attracted to you anyway” dynamic! She knew that was “universally acknowledged” too!

Both styles are fine, and like I said, we don’t get too much of a choice. Maybe it will be the easy-going-friendship-thing where it’s like two halves of something (I don’t know, ummm, cantaloupe) that were seperated at birth and have somehow, in this great big world, found its other half. Or maybe,it will be the “battle of the souls” death-match-of-love where two smart, complex individuals duke it out for the greatest of causes, love.

People fall into our laps( Um, I realize that doesn’t sound quite how I intended it, but you get the idea) and we should be open to the possibilities because actually, there are very very few people out there that are custom made for us. When we’re young, we think, “Oh! There are so many boys I like!” But when you start to widdle away  at the options, the list gets decidedly shorter!

So, enjoy what comes along! And, personally, I wish for all my friends to have a Mr. Darcy at some point because they are definitely worth the struggle.

Just a note on portrayals of both Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley.

I don’t even feel that I need to say this, but I will anyway, Collin Firth is the ONLY Mr. Darcy. I don’t even see anyone else. Is there anyone out there who would disagree?


As for Mr. Bingley… I prefer Simon Woods. He’s beautiful and I love the way he says “untoward” !


So, that’s it. Oh, you might wonder what made me think about this topic and care enough to write about it? I will just say this, Jane Austen is never far from my mind and as for the rest, it’s a secret. xoxo